Needs more Freaks and Geeks

I got a fever, and the only prescription is more Apatow.

It's coming back, friends.

Shite on a bun. And I will love every second of it. Until I hate myself afterwards.

BOOM-SHAKA-LAKA!

Whoops. Guess he's not a Muslim. (CNN)

"I am a Christian by choice," Obama began, standing beneath a blazing sun, when asked why he is a Christian.

"I came to my Christian faith later in life, and it was because the precepts of Jesus Christ spoke to me in terms of the kind of life that I would want to lead," Obama said. "Being my brothers' and sisters' keeper. Treating others as they would treat me. And I think also understanding that, you know, that Jesus Christ dying for my sins spoke to the humility that we all have to have as human beings."

That is all, America.

The Onion Strikes Again

Man Already Knows Everything He Needs To Know About Muslims (The Onion)

"I learned all that really matters about the Muslim faith on 9/11," Gentries said in reference to the terrorist attacks on the United States undertaken by 19 of Islam's approximately 1.6 billion practitioners. "What more do I need to know to stigmatize Muslims everywhere as inherently violent radicals?"

"And now they want to build a mosque at Ground Zero," continued Gentries, eliminating any distinction between the 9/11 hijackers and Muslims in general. "No, I won't examine the accuracy of that statement, but yes, I will allow myself to be outraged by it and use it as evidence of these people's universal callousness toward Americans who lost loved ones when the Twin Towers fell."

The sad and hilarious and demoralizing thing is, you don't have to make this shit up.

On Flopping

From McCovey Chronicles, one of my favorite baseball blogs, and my all-time favorite San Francisco Giants webpage evah:

Also, I got a good idea while watching another sporting event today. On every inside pitch, the Giant hitters should pretend they got hit. And when the umpire tells the hitter to get up because he doesn’t believe the Giants’ hitter was really hit by the pitch, the hitter should writhe in pain even more as if he was hit by the ball from Phantasm, with spikes and auger drills jutting out of it. This should happen after every inside pitch. I think it could give the Giants two or three extra base runners each game.

Just a thought.

Take that, Europe! Schooled in the arts of honesty AND humor. America! Fuck yeah!



Did you expect something different?

Chris Brown photoshop AND sweet vid courtesy of BWE.