The Office

Seriously, you guys blew it. This could have been the year you started to emphasize The Office as an esemble comedy. And you got my hopes up. New credits! Could it be that you fit everyone in, like that episode after the Superbowl?

No.

Hopefully, with Carell moving on, someone is able to breathe new life into this show. Until, at least we have Parks & Rec...though not until November. Geez, NBC.

BTdubs, this is how it should have been:

Hells Yeah

THE WALKING DEAD "Opening Titles" from Daniel Kanemoto on Vimeo.

AND THIS IS A FAN TRAILER! Yes, yes, and triple yes.

BOOM-SHAKA-LAKA!

Whoops. Guess he's not a Muslim. (CNN)

"I am a Christian by choice," Obama began, standing beneath a blazing sun, when asked why he is a Christian.

"I came to my Christian faith later in life, and it was because the precepts of Jesus Christ spoke to me in terms of the kind of life that I would want to lead," Obama said. "Being my brothers' and sisters' keeper. Treating others as they would treat me. And I think also understanding that, you know, that Jesus Christ dying for my sins spoke to the humility that we all have to have as human beings."

That is all, America.

FX: Very Funny

Best. Cold open. Ever.

OK Go and the Internet begin to blurrrrrr

Which came first? The Internet or the OK Go?



I know, I know. Rhetorical.

Mario vs. Bowser

Samuri style, by Vincent Bocognani.



(via Super Punch)

Another reason Bill Belichick is a D-bag

 
I don't like the Patriots. But Tom Brady is one of the best QBs of my lifetime. Bill Belichick, however, is every tool in the box.

Q: What does it mean for a team to have a quarterback like Brady, so consistent year after year? What does it do for an offense or a team to have his presence there?

BB: It’s always good to have consistency on your team at every position and every unit. Certainly quarterback is in that category. 

Thoughts:

1) Yes, quaterback is in the category of positions that need consistency.
2) How hard would it have been to say, "...and with Tom, that's one position I know I don't have to worry about come Sunday. He's proven himself with his play, year after year....Also, dude's smokin'. Have you seen the ladies he brings back his crib? Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaamn."
3) Joe Morgan is Belichick is Joe Morgan. Wha!?!?

(Via CBS Sports)

Quite possibly my favorite church of all time

I have a feeling that this is Andy Sikora's new church and he's just messing with us.

No caption needed.

(via the Daily What)

Official Sad Face Day

To be remembered every September 3rd from here till the damn, dirty apes take over the planet:

Hello from Amazon.com.

Due to a lack of availability from our suppliers, we will not be able to obtain the following item(s) from your order:

 John Heaton, Judy Groves "Introducing Wittgenstein (Introducing (Icon))"
 http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1840466413

We've cancelled the item(s) and apologize for the inconvenience.

Rats. (Also, did Amazon.com really just misspell "canceled"? Or is that a British thing? English is such a confusing language.)

dont cry dawson. well find anthr book abt wittgenstein. promise.

The Onion Strikes Again

Man Already Knows Everything He Needs To Know About Muslims (The Onion)

"I learned all that really matters about the Muslim faith on 9/11," Gentries said in reference to the terrorist attacks on the United States undertaken by 19 of Islam's approximately 1.6 billion practitioners. "What more do I need to know to stigmatize Muslims everywhere as inherently violent radicals?"

"And now they want to build a mosque at Ground Zero," continued Gentries, eliminating any distinction between the 9/11 hijackers and Muslims in general. "No, I won't examine the accuracy of that statement, but yes, I will allow myself to be outraged by it and use it as evidence of these people's universal callousness toward Americans who lost loved ones when the Twin Towers fell."

The sad and hilarious and demoralizing thing is, you don't have to make this shit up.